23 weeks pregnant – twin bump pictures! Also I am hosting baby kickboxing tournaments at present.

25 April – 22 weeks 4 days preggo with the twinnie eggos. (Also no stretch marks at this point!)

I know this isn’t the most anonymous of pictures, and therefore I am breaking my own rules, but I thought I needed to share that every single time TMD takes bump pictures, I end up with terrible sneezing. I have to lean over and really brace myself, making unattractive grimaces, in order to minimise pain and pissing myself!!

Baby bump a dump. The day I wore this shirt is also the day that I got to ride in a motorised wheelchair around a store. I am sorry I do not have a headless picture of  that shot, because I enjoy it. If you are my facebook friend, it’s now my profile picture. If you are NOT my facebook friend but are not a crazy stalker, perhaps at some point we will be friends?!

29 April – 23 weeks 1 day pregnant with the babies.

I don’t know why, but apparently now I am obsessed with sneeze photos. As you can see, this is an action shot – hence the bluriness.

We bought this top very early in pregnancy. TMD suggested I should try it on – and it fits. Shock horror. We originally bought it ’cause I liked the pattern, though it looked completely fucking ridiculous…it was literally like I was wearing a tent. Now it is all screwy fitting – lots of room across the top back, but pretty well fitting across the bump. This top is two sizes too big AND a maternity top.

This is me attempting to convey the width of the bump. I don’t know if it truly comes across.

I have lots of pictures of vitamins, daisies, and my cat, but have decided to show you the view from my latest hospital bed. Above these curtains is the ceiling – painted an apricot orange. The whole thing is like living inside a sunset. Hopefully I’ll never need to spend longer than a night at a time in this particular ward…(not because of the sunset colours, though.)

Last night I took another bath. I’ve gone from thinking they suck to feeling like they are an indispensible part of being alive. I always liked baths, but pregnancy has made them uncomfortable. No longer. My bump is so big it happily sticks out of the water of even a totally full tub, so I don’t feel I have to worry about accidentally poaching the babies.

ANYWAY. It was awesome!

Something I didn’t tell you about the hospital stay was that the first night they listened to the babies with these special monitor things – big round circles they put on your tummy. I just kept saying, ‘How cool! This is just like those baby shows on tv!’ I think the midwife thought I was weird. Moving on…

The babies sounded like they were fucking kickboxing in there. Extreme kicking on both side. And it was SO LOUD because we could hear both at the same time, and the volume was turned way up. The midwife laughed and said we were going to have our hands full when they arrived.

The interesting thing about this is that I discovered a whole new feeling of baby movement. What I had assumed were giant, killer gas bubbles abruptly shifting (you know the feeling, admit it) was actually babies. So now I’ve got low down gas earthquakes, kicks in every direction, and general squirminess. They seem particularly active around 9-11 pm.

So back to bathtime. I was feeling primo kicks, and also saw Mano kick – my bump shot upwards about an inch!! I screamed for TMD (as you do) and she came in. Mano kicked again and there was no mistaking it as us just being hopeful – even pragmatic TMD said she saw the movement. She also put her hand over it and Mano kicked again, so she felt him! Was so happy.

After awhile she left me to my own devices (that means I was reading Make Lemonade for the fiftieth time and loving it). I began to feel the gassy feelings I’d had when the babies were kickboxing at the hospital. I looked down at my stomach and fuck if it wasn’t like some sort of deathmatch going on! Both babies were kicking – saw lots of right-sideways-bump-lurching courtesy of Torre – but with both babies going, my bump was swaying slightly from side to side and sort of slow motion rippling!

I don’t know what they are doing in there, but I don’t know if it looks fun!

I think I’m going to go now as I have to pee so badly I am sure I will leak when I stand up. Add that to the fact that I’m wearing a Fat Lady nightgown my mother sent over (with a maternity belt over the top of it), and you have one hot sexy girlie. I can’t imagine why people aren’t flocking around from neighboring streets, begging to have their picture taken with me.

Bathtub fun. And advice needed.

The night before last I took a bath as I was quite achy. While lying in the tub, I glanced down at my stomach and suddenly felt a kick on the lower right side (think this is Torre!) and my whole stomach lurched to that side. I didn’t totally believe it, so kept watching. Saw teensy tiny movements from the outside, so yelled for TMD to come look.

Things calmed down, TMD left. I kept looking, and then started to put my hand on the right side where I was feeling kicks – and am pretty freaking sure I felt the baby from the outside! Screamed for TMD again. She ran into the bathroom, plunging her arm into the water to get a good angle on my tummy. Nothing. She prepared to leave, and I admonished her – ‘You would be shit at fishing, you know, it requires a lot of patience.’ So suddenly baby-hunting was referred to as ‘fishing.’

Well, the cycle repeated several times – me feeling/seeing movement and yelling for her, her coming in, things calming down. We even used a flashlight on my tummy, to which there were responses. She THINKS she felt a little something, but nothing 100% absolute. At one point I also felt a little something (a foot?) sort of pushing against my tummy and it was quite noticeable. How cool, eh!

Then yesterday I think I felt her (?) from the outside again. I can’t wait for it to be very strong and absolute, no questions asked – and for TMD to be able to feel it.

So: next topic.

Yesterday I felt something like trapped wind in my stomach during the day. Nothing terrible. I ate my four/five prunes (recommended by midwife as things are ‘slowing down’ for me in the poop department). Then it started getting worse when I changed position. My mind immediately turned to the fiber bars my mother has sent. She warned me to only eat half a bar to start with as I would be running to the bathroom a lot. There was also a little label on the bar saying they may cause gastrointestinal pain while the body adjusts to increased fiber intake.

I thought, what the hell. My stomach hurts, this is fiber – and SHIT it was tasty. Ate my half a bar and didn’t really think anything else of it.

Big mistake.

BIG mistake.

By bedtime, the pain in my lower left abdomen was so strong I was crying and moaning. It was relieved somewhat by sitting in my glider, so spent some time in there feeling better. When I got into bed, it was INTENSE. Pain was still concentrated in my lower left, under my bump, but also wrapped around to my back so my lower left back hurt as well. I was making horrid noises I’ve never heard a human make. I was letting out little pops of air – more wind than I’ve had in the last 23 weeks put together. Nothing helped. Got up to go to the bathroom and could barely walk as it hurt so bad when I moved my left leg. No poop.

On the way back, I got some wicked cramping/pain in my right hip (I am awesome, I know) and needed a crutch to get back to the glider. Ended up sleeping in the glider for about half the night – perhaps not great for the SPD, but an awesome relief for the gas pain. Eventually woke up and shifed into bed. Cue some long, drawn out farts. I felt a lot better – some pain still there, but only at the discomfort level. Fell asleep.

Woke up, more farts, pain still there but not too terrible. Cue big poop.

Now I’m lying on the couch (surprise, surprise) and things seem to be building up again. I am pretty confident it IS trapped wind and nothing scary, as last night I could feel air/things moving around. But at one point when I was on the toilet, I was shaking and crying and TMD wondered if we should go to the hospital.

So, past or current pregnant gals, is this wind pain? Did you get it? What helps? Would be good to know this is normal, as I suspect it’s perfectly fine. Of course I’ve done some googling and, as always, am mildly worried by some of the info I found. Advice needed!

One sentence I did read yesterday in a pregnancy book did say something like, ‘In late pregnancy, the size of the baby might push your internal organs out of place, causing mild wind pains.’ Mild my ass.

Edit: Pain/discomfort still there. Hurts more when I move aorund or change position. Still mostly lower left side, but also perhaps more central as well. Also have a very specific localised ache in my back, sort of where my left kidney would be. No pain when peeing – though pain from sitting on the toilet. It’s like when I had to poop and my ovaries were all big from IVF! Ouchie.

Reminder for me.

Last night in the bath Torre (I think) kicked so hard my whole bump lurched to one side!! Also felt (I think! heh) movement from the outside, with a bit more today.

Going to post about this tomorrow – don’t let me forget!

So very, very cool.