Posts Tagged ‘toys’

Christmas worries come a knocking.

November 22, 2012

This holiday season, our current interests are….

Coconut: gymnastics, human skeletons and organs, doctor type things, costumes, pirates, puzzles, Cars.

Snort: Cars. And human babies. Possibly a bit of Spiderman.

At football on Monday, as Snort and his two little friends ran around playing in the University sports centre, the other mums started discussing Christmas. One said she’d got each kid fourteen gifts. The other has been buying Cars for the last four months. When I got home, I got a piece of paper intended to write down what we had gotten the kids so far.

That’s when I realised that I’d better pull my fucking finger out of my ass.

I put another football mum on the Cars hunt, as a crappy little shop near her sells them new for much cheaper than I’ve seen anywhere else. I started bidding on shit on eBay. We actually had to move money over to be able to afford gifts. That is The Suck.

You know what else? My mom made my sister and I stockings when we were little. TMD and I actually made stockings for each other for an early Christmas together, with no foreknowledge of this (not the first or last time for the same gift!). Last year I was running around two days before Christmas, crying and sweating in various shops, desperate to find the kids some stockings. There were none left, except for disgusting Baby’s First Christmas ones. I sucked it up and bought them, as they didn’t read.

I was safe in the knowledge that we would make them stockings this year, months in advance. I even carefully planned out how they should look.

Here we are, a month before Christmas, and I don’t even have fabric yet.

We also don’t own a printer, microwave, or freezer. Soooo I’m thinking we should get the kids rocks, just in the spirit of the house shaped cave we live in!

Seriously, though, most of my wooden toy dreams have collapsed under the weight of diecast Cars characters and skeleton posters. I’m obsessed with trying to give them equivalent holiday experiences, which is tricky given that Snort really only wants Cars toys and Coconut has more varied interests. Are equivalent experiences measured by price, by quantity of things to unwrap? I’ve decided to try to roughly get them the same (smallish) number of things they will really love and appreciate. That way everyone wins, right?

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Missing toys and period. The drama lives on.

November 15, 2012

Having a blah day.

Not just because Snort lost Finn yesterday and I still can’t find him.

Not because he lost his favourite Cars guy, a Lightning McQueen we customised the wheels on, this morning.

Not because I decided to organise the Cars and realised I am not only missing Coconut’s travel toy bag (JuJuBe BeQuick. I recommended these for every use you can think of. I love them!) I planned to put her cars in.

Not even because I then discovered we are missing four of her five Cars characters.

Just because. The above is mildly depressing. We just have so much STUFF. But they play with it all. On a day like today, though, I want to box it all up and live a minimalist life. Largely empty, beautiful rooms with only a handful of toys. Oh, god, can you imagine how good it would be?

Of course, I am a hypocrite because much of the junk in our house is actually mine. Or it wasmostly mine, before we were overrun with toys. Please god let me find the missing Cars. It’s too grey a day to be looking for secondhand Finn McMissiles on eBay. And even worse, the missing Lightning. He knows all of his Lightnings and they each are different to him, so it’s not like we can whip out the sharpies and customise another one’s wheels, because he will know.

I don’t want to go to home ed group today. I want to stay home in sweatpants. I want a good friend or two to come over and drink tea and laugh with me, while my children (and yours?) rip the house further apart, possibly losing more vital Cars toys into some unnameable, impossible chasm that swallows things.

If I buy a new Finn (two, actually, because our cars all have dabs of nail varnish on the bottom and I can’t dab just him one because you know his old one will turn up the second the new one arrives, leaving Coconut with a Finn with the wrong colour varnish on the bottom. Are you confused? WELCOME TO MY LIFE.)…..oh, god.

I wonder if I can justify skipping group by the fact that the kids have vaguely runny noses. And that I will somehow find something even super cooler to do. It’s just so grey and cold out! And my brain can’t handle the missing toys. Snort takes all his cars everywhere we go. They are pretty much the only toys he plays with. So losing his two favourite is a bitch. He seems to be adapting to the limbo missing state better than me. Perhaps because I stayed up till midnight, which I never do, and then was awake most of the night itching uncontrollably. Just like when I was pregnant.

Also just like I was pregnant….the fact that my period is like a week late. I am never late. A few friends who have had failed IVF said it took their bodies four months to get back to normal. I was glad to hear this, because my period being this late almost convinced me I was entering the menopause.

I….what? Tangent, much?

We love the kitchen.

December 18, 2010

Our mums said because we are snowed in we needed something new to do. Mummy wanted to give us something called The Big Gift, but Mama said no.  So then we got to open our gift from our Auntie Aussie.

We love it. Pots and pans are awesome.

Mama made a video of us in the big kitchen today but said YouTube is being a little bitch. So I guess that video is coming. We like videos.

And pots and pans.

Love,
Snort and Coconut

A junkie in the truest sense.

May 18, 2008

I have a passion for things that are both funky and useless. These include the wonderful lanyards, homies, and smooth glass pieces from the beach which are currently nestled in a box I’ve just packed. Also in the box are a rubber ducky and her three children, a bag of marbles TMD once bought me, about six travelcard wallets, and an assortment of crap.

Many of the things I own are intrinsically cool, the sort of thing I want to surround myself with in my new writer’s room in the new house (the room formerly known as ‘therapy room’ and futurely known as ‘baby’s room’). The problem is that I have too many.

The McDonald’s toy chicken nugget dressed as a dinosaur is one of the only givens I know I will have proudly on display, and possibly my Rubik’s cube. You know, because every time I see it I pick it up, twirl it around, and joyfully proclaim that I’m going to start playing with it. Any. Day. Now.

The problem isn’t only acquiring these things (from fast foot restaurant floors – I shit you not, my sister, TMD, friends, holidays, stores, freebies in various places), no. The true problem is that I can’t throw anything away. I imbue everything with a supernatural amount of sentimentality. That being said, I have gotten rid of astronomical amounts of books, clothes, shoes, video tapes, music tapes, workplace binders, etc. But there seems to be an infinite amount of ‘stuff’, and the things I have the most trouble getting rid of are those that have no use.

Right now I’m sitting here with a promotional ribbon lanyard hung around my neck, nothing dangling from the end.