Posts Tagged ‘pregnancy’

Cast away.

September 14, 2008

For the moment, I’ve decided that babychart.wordpress.com is too much fucking trouble. Back to Fertility Friend I go.

Truth is, since we’ve basically decided on IVF life has turned good again. I’m still taking my temp every morning and peeing on little ovulation sticks, but I’m not so fussed about the whole thing. I’m having some coffee at work and some Diet Coke at home.

I’m got more relaxed about my cervix (although it was SO LOW today it felt like it was trying to make a break for freedom). Everything seems easier and more normal, and I think that is because IVF takes the trouble out of conceiving. Don’t get me wrong – it adds injections and all sorts of IVF-y problems, but it makes me less fearful to take an allergy pill because they dry out your cervical fluid, and that is a sign of fertility.

I took an allergy pill last night and it was almost sensual it’s been so long since I had one.

I think IVF is the way I’ll feel most like myself, able to just live ordinary life – at least for the next month or two while we build up to it. And I think pregnancy is best and most likely when life is going on as per usual (assuming, of course, that life per usual doesn’t involve drugs/alcohol/bad things).

While gardening today I kept thinking, ‘Next year at this time there will be a little baby.’ I really hope that’s true. Or true times two.

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Paranoia looks good on me.

August 7, 2008

So excited about http://babychart.wordpress.com . I am going to try to only put charting stuff over there, because I don’t want to start diverting info from here to there – I once had a good number of blogs going, and while that’s fun in a sick way…it’s also just sick.

I plan to upload all the info into an online fertility chart maker, so that at the end of each month I’ll also have a traditional chart done. Am reading an excellent book now – can’t remember the name, will get back to you – that is specifically aimed at lesbians, though I think it would make a useful read for anyone interested in fertility and conception. The only thing that minorly scared me was how timing is absolutely crucial in terms of IUI.

IUI = intrauterine insemination. Specially prepared sperm is injected directly into my uterus, as near as possible to the entry of the fallopean tubes.

More about that later, I suppose. I’m alone in the office at the moment, and the rain sounds lovely against our millions of windows. I wish I could stay in all day, but I’ve got a little field trip out this afternoon. This would be exciting were it not my third field trip of the week, and the least wow factor-ish.

I have lost three pounds since Monday, putting me at 8 pounds overweight. I don’t want to lose now because it apparently has quite an impact on fertility. Yes, a high BMI can fuck your fertility – so lose weight well before you plan to conceive. But dieting in the three months or so before conception can screw with your hormones. So I suppose I aim to maintain my weight, or else lose it at an excruciatingly slow pace.

Also trying to think in terms of baby food. What I feed my body now will definitely impact on the baby – from their implantation right through the pregnancy. I also deserve to honour myself with healthy and realistic eating.

Speaking of which, I’m quite hungry now. Can you hear my stomach grumbling? (That’s different to ordinary rumbling, you see, because my stomach is acutually quite opinionated.)

Been thinking about the whole clinical supervision thing as well. I admit I have sent an email saying I am interested, but I really have a gut feeling that it’s not right. It would be a fabulous opportunity and I do think I’d enjoy it and learn a lot, but I do think maybe there is something in the idea of creating space in my/our lives for this baby. Will talk to TMD again tonight to clarify my thinking, and then possibly email the director of the company.

Everyone agrees this is a wonderful thing to do – but these are also the very people who do not know about The Great Baby Making Plan of 2008.

In other news, the pain in my right side is still alive and kicking. Have made an appointment to see my doctor on Monday. I may switch to a new doctor in my local area after the cyst is removed, because I don’t want this lady to think I’m a hypochondriac or something.