Am I the only one who scans?
You know what I mean. You walk through a room (or lean heavily on crutches, whatevs) and your eyes swing from side to side, noting important details.
Okay, little Spiderman with the slightly larger yellow eyes is on the floor in front of the couch. Bunny is sprawled in the corner. That tiny piece of impossibly important shoestring is on the bookshelf.
I try to store these nuggets of information so that I can casually and gracefully throw out answers to the constant pleas for assistance to find shit. Scanning is a great tool, if your memory complies. But what the hell do you do when your kid is holding a spiderman and asks for a ‘web zipper’? By the time it takes you to work out that he wants the five inches of thread connected to window suckers, by the time you actually manage to find it, just as you thrust your fist victoriously in the air, your kid says, ‘Where’s my Spiderman? I just had him.’
I’m constantly saying, ‘I don’t know. You JUST had him/it/her. You need to try to remember where you put stuff down, take some responsibility for your toys. Everyone would be happier if we all remembered where our own stuff was.’
They just look at me. ‘But where is my Spiderman? You help me?’
Increasingly, my help looks like guiding them through the process of what it means to search for a missing toy – checking under the couch, thinking about where we last played with it, etc. But no matter what I do, the flood of almost constant requests to find shit never really tapers off. They are getting really good at ‘finding’ stuff they aren’t currently looking for, though.
‘Oh look, here is The Other Twin’s Special Thing! I found it! Other Twin, I found your thing!’ This usually results in them moving it from a visible area to some other zone of lost toys, and thus the circle goes round and round.