Archive for November 13th, 2012

PottymouthMommy, Mamacrow, Mel, and friends….

November 13, 2012

Someone on my Facebook linked me to this super car tool. It’s a keychain, ResQMe (I know, that’s a gross name), that is a centre punch AND a seatbelt cutter. It handily comes in many bright colours.

Another friend (hi, Lauren!) mentioned she didn’t know if she would be able to own that without testing it out. As we drove to meet her at the farm today, I kept glancing at my window and thinking about if I could actually resist exploding the glass at some point. Because that’s what it is: an explosion. You touch it to the glass and BOOM. No more fucking glass, like magic.

Pretty irresistible, am I right?

The thing is, I love water. I’ve been driving since I was fifteen and never been in an accident. I get that some people think about this car crashing into the water shit a lot, but I’m not one of them. Well, at least not until the past three days. But my point is, does it make me MORE weird to think about this when it isn’t a valid phobia or something that is even remotely likely to happen to us?

The day before this drama started, we were walking in town along this canal. It had no fence or barrier, and about a teen foot drop into a very deep, wide, freezing body of water. Of course, I visualised a kid or two running madly towards the edge and freefalling to hypothermic broken bones and water soaked lungs. Though I guess that is, at least, reasonable. Because we were in a scenario where it could happen. Even TMD was like, ‘I’ll jump in, you call the ambulance.’ ACTION PLANS, people.

Normally she rolls her eyes at me. She’s also been quoted this week as saying, in response to my querying if she never genuinely thinks of shit like this, ‘I think about them getting lost in a store, not plummeting into the ocean.’

Anyway, all that aside, I have a ResQMe on the way. I envision myself using it to swoop to the rescue of someone else’s car crash. Or maybe a fire! I’ll be a glass breaking, seatbelt cutting vision….determination in my eyes, hair flowing like a golden rescuer, people weeping they are so happy to see me coming.


Did I mention morbid dream sequences are not the only ones I have?

Water car crashes take two, friends, and DIY plaster cast fixes.

November 13, 2012

My Facebook profile was the source of very funny and detailed discussions regarding the whole car crashing into the water thing. In addition to the handful of people who knew where I was coming from, including a friend who actually refuses to drive over water without opening a window, there was more than a few who took the absolute piss out of me.

Especially when someone else said we might as well drive wearing life jackets, when I raised the non-swimming children issue. Another person suggested just always driving with the windows all down, since those life jackets would keep us warm. The same friend mocked a picture of me sat in our parked car yesterday, telling me to watch out for water…because you never know.

She is right. You DON’T ever know.


In other news, coconut’s cast seems to be slowly unravelling. It’s gone softer and softer, and the edge of the hard plaster bandage part is coming off. I used a glue stick to attempt to stick it back on. Wasn’t very successful. I guess my Dr Google medical training is defunct because it didn’t tell me to keep medical grade plaster of Paris in the house at all times.

Regardless, her unravelling cast, her, Snort, and I had a lovely morning at a local city farm with the little girl Coconut classes as her best friend. Lots of autumnal leaf throwing, delicious cafe food (for the grown ups, anyway. The kids were only interested in chips/fries.), and a nice walk. Sunday we are meeting another new friend in a place I’ve been wanting to go since we moved here. She described it as a sort of outdoor utopia. Let’s hope the weather is nice.

I was thinking this morning about building my own tribe. I am steadily meeting more and more people I really like. We are getting out and about a lot. Broken arms and snotty noses aside, things are good.