Ah, all that shit about being inspired to start over again? I decided to do so by giving myself fifteen minutes to write fiction a night. No pressure, no biggie, right?
Except I got totally freaked out. So I thought, ‘Hey, no problemo. I’ll blog instead.’ Except I froze up.
I think it’s fair to say this shit is a pretty large phobia. Please help me over my phobia. Ease me into shit. Leave a comment with a suggestion for a blog entry – maybe a question you have about me/TMD/etc, a philosophical query like those in ‘The Big Book of Questions,’ or something like ‘write a two paragraph work of fiction about bananas.’ Or even ‘hit me up with two sentences from one of your completed novels.’
(Hell, you can even leave multiple comments. This is the one time you don’t need to fear judgement for doing so, because I will not be judging. I will be LICKING YOU THROUGH YOUR COMPUTER SCREEN. Good licking, not the sort of licking that leads to cannibalism and putting the lotion on its skin or anything.)
I will then have dozens (ha) of comments to work through when I freeze up. SO PLEASE HELP UNFREEZE ME. Don’t read this and run. I fucking see how many page views I get every day, and that shit does not match up with the teensy number of comments I get. I bleed when I don’t get comments like everyone else does, but you know I do not comment-grub. So cut me some slack.
Let’s aim for twelve comments. DO IT.
Unfreeze me. Anonymously, obnoxiously, I don’t care. Just do it.