Shit my wife probably doesn’t want me to blog about, but she doesn’t ever read this anyway.

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Y’all, I just got off the phone with a fertility clinic in the city we are moving to. Apparently fertility clinic lingo is permanently imprinted in my brain – unlike names of past classmates, what I had for breakfast, or most anything else. I was all, ‘Yeah, send me out an information pack on IVF, ICSI, IUI, price lists, tests needed in advance….just everything you’ve got, really.’ They seem like a really nice clinic – and one of the top ten in our country, apparently – but they don’t do eggsharing.

Motherchucker.

Eggsharing is how we AFFORD IVF. I don’t think we can get free treatment as lesbians, so we need to fund it ourselves. And when you share eggs, you save moolah. (And enrich someone else’s life, of course!)

So. I’m on the hunt for a local clinic that accepts private patients and has an eggshare programme in full swing. This first clinic I’ve just got off the phone with is apparently planning to start eggsharing in the summer, so I am definately keeping them in mind. At least once I’ve seen the prices.

And, no, it’s not going to be me. If all goes well – and no reason it shouldn’t – my lovely wife is going to be the pregnant one this time. I read a number of lesbian babymaking blogs, and most of my friends are now on baby number two (or more), using the non-birth mother of their first kid. So…welcome us to that club.

We need to get moving on this whole thing, because eggsharing stops at 36. And TMD turns 35 in a month. I also always wanted our kids to be clumped together in age, and we’ve already fucked that up! (Please let 35 year olds be eligible! All info on all sites states ages 18-35 or something, but I was never certain exactly what that meant. Were you cut off at 35 or 36? My friend down the road – who also has IVF twins – did eggsharing and she was 35. So fingers crossed!)

I swear to god among all the other valid reasons for wanting a third child, I need another one just to justify the upcoming purchase of a secondhand BIG ASS CAR. My mother in law was all, ‘I hope you aren’t moving down here and having more children. I can’t help out if you have a tonne.’ Uh, okay. But I want a big car and by GOD having a third child justifies that. People keep joking I want it because the country I was born in is all about gas guzzling giant cars – and they are probably right, but here in Country B cars are more fuel efficient and just generally less shitty for the environment.

So. Babies, cars, my mother in law (who is lovely and I KNOW she would babysit while we went around getting my wife all knocked up. Or ‘with child.’ Whatever you prefer.). Are you keeping up?

I’m so fucking nuts I’m already thinking: one embryo transfer or two? I’ve always wanted another set of twins – no lie – and four kids would be niiiiiiice. I knew I’d never be able to carry more than one again, but TMD….hmmm. That being said, having only one baby would be like a fucking vacation. My slings are calling to me, people.

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5 Responses to “Shit my wife probably doesn’t want me to blog about, but she doesn’t ever read this anyway.”

  1. PottyMouthMommy Says:

    squeeeeeeeeeeeee!!! more babbies!!!

    I know, lame-as-heck comment right… forgive my full-time- working-preggo-mommy-of-a-toddler-who-hates-sleep (I totally wrote that as “slep” the first two times) brain.

    Also, very happy that TMD will get a chance to try on the whole pregnancy shebang- and you will love taking care of her and experiencing pregnancy from the other side!! I can’t wait to read all about it!

    • me Says:

      I lub you. I only ever read blogs on my phone and it won’t let me comment….but I am still reading. Also committed to turning on the actual computer now and then so you will be hearing from me!! And I am excited. I want that baby NOW.

  2. mendylady Says:

    Babies!!!

    We’re about to start TTC #3 also – babydust all around!!

  3. Jess Collingwood Says:

    Words cannot express how excited I am over this blog post. Omg babies! Yaaayy!!!

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