Sometimes I feel like TMD would be a better stay at home mom than me.  I hate feeling this way. Like I am somehow letting my tiny children down, in so many ways.


5 Responses to “Truth.”

  1. mamacrow Says:

    hugs. i know how you feel. for me, when I feel the rage start building, I know I have to up water/sleep (ha ha) and maybe adjust my zinc and b6 xxx

  2. Jen Says:

    I’m never sure whether to write that I feel the same way–so you feel less alone–or what I do to make it better–to help you feel better, too. So I’ll do both.
    I’ve got such a short temper lately. Especially when they’re whining or messing with the laptop (lol, ethan just unplugged it and I yanked the cord out of his hand. nice.) I’ve yelled at the babes, yelled at them to shut up, yelled at Ethan to “just stop wiggling, damnit” when changing his diaper, etc. And sitting here right now, with everything going well and just the normal stressors, it’s hard for me to imagine what could be so stressful in my life that I would feel the need to yell at these two perfect babies. But I know–when I get tired, or when the pain’s bad, or when I’ve eaten nothing but shit all day, then everything goes to hell. and then I’ll yell, and they’ll look at me with that startled-scared expression and I feel so incredibly guilty that I think I should NOT be the one staying home with them. It’s funny–you posted this, but I was just thinking that exact thought last week. Thinking, what would it take for me to go back to work full time, and for chris to be the one staying home more often. I don’t know.
    For me, what helps is getting out of the house. I know that’s really hard for you. But sometimes even a 20 minute walk around the block to cool down will help. Or finding them something to do OTHER than use me as a jungle gym. even something as simple as–if I have to be working on the computer(for work or something)–get up on the couch rather than sit on the floor. I think in one way we’re lucky to have twins in that they always have someone to play with. My singleton mamas talk about always having to be playing with their babes, 24/7(well, while they’re awake, but you know what I mean). Right now, Lyra and ethan are delighting in offering eachother their sippy cups on the floor. There’s a fair portion of the time where they don’t need help playing from me.

    Sometimes it’s hard to see the forest for the trees–I look at all the screwups I make sometimes, and don’t see the happy, healthy, well adjusted toddlers L&E are becoming. I know coco and snort are the same. You aren’t alone, you aren’t a crappy mother, and you are good for your babies
    @reply me if you need to chat, mama, or msg me on FB. I’m here.

  3. Katie B. Says:

    *hugs* I suck at it, some days more than others. The last year has been pretty much TV babysitting. :/

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