Conversations with my wife: #2

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Me: You know what would be a really horrible way to die?

TMD: Hmm?

Me: If they stuck a stick of dynamite up your ass, and then lit the fuse. You’d have to be listening to the SSSSSSH of the fuse, knowing it was going to blow up.

TMD: *long pause* You are so fucked up. You are deranged. Normal people do not think of these things.

Me: *long pause* I guess you could try to poop it out. *I squat to mime pooping out dynamite*

TMD: Stop it.

Me: Actually, I guess if you managed to poop it out, you could then kick it away from you.

TMD: You couldn’t, I couldn’t, maybe David Beckham could.

Me: I don’t know – we could kick the stick of dynamite, it just wouldn’t go far. I don’t know what the range of dynamite is, though, and if it would blow us up anyway.

TMD: No, me either.

*life carries on*

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2 Responses to “Conversations with my wife: #2”

  1. Shilo Says:

    You gals crack me the fuck up. You totes should have your own tv show. haha

  2. @WannabeMomErin Says:

    I love you, you weirdo!

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