Archive for January 30th, 2010

Imma pop a cap in yo’ ass, bitch!!

January 30, 2010


Edited highlights.

January 30, 2010

Taking the babies into ‘a leading global city and one of the world’s financial centres’ (thanks, Wiki) today for a birthday lunch with Compadre.

As we have missed most of his birthdays – even pre-children – he must realise how much we love him to bundle them up and take them to The Big City. We’ll have to be on guard to make sure they don’t run away into a life of debauchery or crime. (Ha, we are totally going to this posh area where we used to live and the worst crime is probably a rich twenty-something vomiting in public at 3 in the morning.) In fact, I know a non-rich girl who may have vomited up red wine on the sidewalk once. She lives in our house, but she ain’t me. Just sayin’.

There is snow on the ground, so hopefully all the dumbasses in this area who never see snow and assume that cars cannot be used with snow – but go out anyway, sliding around like fucking bumper cars – will decide to stay in for once.

Don’t know where this weather has come from. Yesterday afternoon it was so sunny and gorgeous and I thought to myself, ‘Self, you’ve got to buck up. Take the babies for a walk. You will all like it.’ Got them strapped to me, got outside, got to the furthest point away from the house, and suddenly weird white balls were falling.

I thought, ‘Leftover petals from this tree? Styrofoam balls, why are there so many fucking styrofoam balls?’ Then I realised it was hail. Giant hailballs that only increased in size and were pelting down. Coconut was NOT impressed. Snort didn’t seem to care too much. I made right for the house while trying to stop Coconut’s face from being blasted off by the killer hail.


We go into the city today, for the first time since our trip to the Embassy to get them their passports/foreign birth certificates. We may try to cram them into their snowsuits, which probably won’t fit, but if you see a two mom family with what appears to be giant teddy bears strapped to their fronts, make sure you stop and say hi.

They are wearing their new amber teething necklaces and looking hawt, so we’ll have to closely supervise Compadre and C Dawg to make sure they don’t spirit the babies off to join them for the pub crawl due to start after our lunch. We’re planning on skipping that part!!

Love to you all.