Longest entry with babies, and stinging nipples.


Today we registered the birth of Mano and Torre (names for use of blog to be decided on, and a way for you to find out real names will be posted soon!) and received birth certificates. What an entourage we were – TMD’s dad’s girlfriend pushing my wheelchair, TMD pushing the giant double pram, and her dad snapping away with two cameras. This was our first real trip out, and Mano and Torre both behaved themselves in a fashion befitting Perfect Lovely Little Babies.

We are slowly trying to organise everything else we need to do – get TMD parental responsiblity, attempting to book apts to get them passports for Country A, etc etc. When this is all over and done with, we will have seven passports between us. Mental.

I want to write about some of the glories, and some of the real challenges, that have been part of our little family. Some of the areas make me nervous to write about, particularly in regards to feeding. I know people have very strong opinions on this matter – and rightly so – but it requires a little more awakeness to write coherently, and a little more time to do it thoughtfully. Feeding has been our only real challenge thus far, aside from what I assume is the ‘normal’ sleep deprivation and time issues.

I think about people with only one baby (please please please do not take offense!) and I wonder what it must be like to have such an easy life! I also wonder what it would be like to not have two little human beings bopping around, which seems inconceiveable to me. Since before we knew we definitely were having twins, since before we knew I was definitely pregnant, we have always expected to have these two little ones. Life is more fun, more hectic, more tiring. But we love it. I don’t know what we would have done with ourselves without that ‘extra’ person. (Thank god it’s not triplets, though. Seriously.)

At this point, Mano and Torre naturally gravitate towards being on the same schedule. But it’s like cars waiting to turn at a junction – when I was a child, I never understood how sometimes the blinkers/indicators would be in sync, only to then get completely opposite to each other within seconds. Twins are like that, or at least ours are. They are good little sleepers, though. If only there was not so much to do when they were asleep and TMD and I could occasionally nap as well!

My SPD is still really bad. Going to have physiotherapy at home, and have been told it will probably be five to six months until I recover. This is personally very challenging for me. I can’t do all the things normal moms do – change diapers, pick up a baby, walk around with a baby, make feeds, pick out outfits. It’s funny, as I worried about TMD feeling left out as the non-biological mom. In reality, I feel very left out and frustrated because I am missing out on all the babydom things I want to be doing.

It also means a lot of the weight of things is on TMD. Even if I do all the night feeds, for example, she still has to be awake to get the bottles, clean the breast pump, hand me babies, change diapers, etc. I think she felt awkward the other day, though, because she took them for a lovely walk in the park (again, I wonder when I will be able to take them out – or even take MYSELF out, for that matter) and no one commented on the twins….this is odd because they are twins (aka attention grabbers). She said she felt like people thought she was an au pair because she clearly had not just given birth.

Regardless, we soldier on.

Mano and Torre are both incredibly aware – easily able to focus on my eyes, etc. Torre is a particularly strong little girl, considering she’s a pound lighter than her brother. The babies are both very into cuddles….crap, I think Mano is stirring.

Okay. Going to have to come back later.

Do any of you have any questions about us, the babies, etc? Feel free to leave a comment with one, two, or seven questions. I am online when pumping, and short entries requiring only one hand could be useful for me! At the moment both kidlets are asleep and we have done a LOT in this….yes, Mano awake and snorting. Like a little pig.

Or a donkey.

See you on the flip side.


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10 Responses to “Longest entry with babies, and stinging nipples.”

  1. Tatiana Says:

    No questions, just lots of love.

    I honestly can’t imagine having twins. I was terrified of the thought of being pregnant with two. And no, it’s not insulting to me for you to think that one must be easy. I’m sure it’s easier than two. But my experience is just with one, and it’s sure as hell been difficult at times.

    Anyhow, I hope your SPD clears up faster than doctors are saying it will. I don’t want you to be in agony. If it takes 6 months, the little ones will be more mobile than you!

  2. Jennie Says:

    So, what’s been the biggest surprise/most unexpected bit of the first couple of weeks of motherhood for you both? And I’m not at all offended at you saying that twins are harder – I’m not at all surprised! It took all our time to cope with just one when we had our first, so I’d be very impressed if you’re getting any sleep at all! But that wasn’t reassuring and positive…I think it’ll be easier than having just one baby when they get to the stage (not too many months away) where they start to properly interact with each other, because perhaps then they won’t be constantly wanting to be picked up and fussed, the way my oldest did. I couldn’t put him down for a minute while he was awake until he could move himself, and then he’d follow me everywhere.

    I’m really interested to find out what differences you notice in their characters in the coming months as their personalities emerge. Stupid, I know, but I was amazed when my second son was so different from my first. I think I’d subconsciously imagined a carbon copy arriving, and it took a long time to get over the surprise!

    Oh, and MAJORLY jealous, by the way, of all your friends and family who get to cuddle two little heaps of newborn cuteness at the same time. No sign of any babies among any of my nearest and dearest at the moment, so I’m definitely baby starved! Take care of yourselves, and don’t try to do too much. And if it all gets too much, remember that there’s a point (mine was at exactly three months with both babies) where everything suddenly got so much easier, and it felt like everything fell into place.

  3. Jennie Says:

    Ooh, that was a bit long! Sorry!

  4. Organic Nectars Premium Raw Tibetan Goji Berries, “Goji Babies”, 3-Ounce Pouch | Goji Berry Says:

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  5. Tia Says:

    I want a blow by blow of the day they were born…you know whenever you can. And more pictures!

  6. Jenny Says:

    It’s so fun to read about your and TMD’s adventures with Mano and Torre. I’m not at all surprised that twins are twice as much work, if not more so. We found one child to be way easier and more managable than stories had led us to believe – we fully acknowledge that we have it very very easy. 🙂

    I’m flabbergasted by the experience TMD had, though. As a nonbio mom, I was out and about with our kidlet just as soon as he got home from the hospital. My wife didn’t have a c-section, and only one baby, so her recovery was a great deal more straightforward, but she still didn’t feel like going for a 5 mile run on hills at 5 days postpartum (or ever, ha ha). So when I went out with the baby people were just so incredibly amazed at how I could be jogging around with a brand-new newborn. It was a huge attention getter all on its own, actually — people kept asking me how I had managed to lose the weight so quickly, and did I have a natural childbirth, and what kind of amazing shape was I in before giving birth, anyway? I always cheerfully explained that no, his other mom was the one who gave birth, but it still drew a huge amount of attention to be out being physically active with such a young baby.

    We picked our (known) donor because we trusted him completely and not at all for reasons of his appearance, which is kind of opposite mine in most regards, so I was initially worried that people wouldn’t assume that I’m the mom when I’m out alone with our baby. This hasn’t happened yet, though.

  7. Jinxy Says:

    I really hope your SPD gets better soon. I can’t imagine how hard it would be to not be able to do the normal Mom things with your babies. I’m sorry you are having to deal with that. But I’m so glad that you and TMD are handling it all so well and are so happy.

    7 passports, good luck keeping track of all of that.

    I don’t have any questions that I can think of right now. But I love hearing about the babies and you guys.

  8. Lisa Says:

    Hello. I have been following your blogs for a bit now. My partner & I are also pregnant with twin boys, she is 30 weeks now. We did this at home, no fertility drugs, just a willing donor who gave us the little swimmers. LOL we were so excited to just get pregnant, let alone with two! I have been looking for other lesbian mothers of twins, but no luck thus far. Your babies are beautiful & I am very happy for both of you.


  9. Daren Parsons Says:

    If I had a quarter for every time I came to existere.wordpress.com… Superb post!

  10. Angelo Guthrie Says:

    Really awesome read. Truely..

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